Canada’s free medical services would benefit Trump, from dermatology to treat his orangeness to experimental hand enlargement surgery.
From a young age, we’re taught to smile and say “thank you,” no matter what we open on Christmas morning. If that gift happens to be from your boyfriend, you need a real plan as to what happens after. How do you react to your boyfriend’s Christmas present?
Here are a couple tips from our hearts to yours.
You Open: A basket of lavender-scented bath salts, shower gel and bubble bath.
How To React: Be sure to ask his mother where she found them.
You Open: A mint condition original Furby.
How to React: Very, very carefully. They can sense fear.
You Open: A gift card
How To React: He is trying to get you to break up with him. We suggest doing so.
You Open: A Walk To Remember on Blu-Ray
How To React: Prepare everyone, especially yourself, for your ugly cry.
You Open: A plain sweater that he said “reminded him of you.”
How To React: Silently wonder for the rest of your life what he meant by that.
You Open: Keys to his basement storage.
How To React: Come to terms with the fact that he’s a serial killer; decide how much of a turn-off that is for you personally.
You Open: The same cookie jar your grandmother had when you were growing up.
How To React: Start fantasizing about what your grandchildren will look like, because it’s ON now.
You Open: A brand new pair of men’s size 11 Nike Air Max Tailwind 6s.
How To React: Hand them over in defeat. Pretend not to remember you got him tickets to Cirque Du Soleil last year… even though he asked for those sneakers.
You Open: A Cheese of The Month Club membership
How To React: Suddenly realize this man loves you and knows you better than anyone else ever will.
You Open: A waaaaaay more thoughtful and expensive gift than you gave him.
How To React: Run. Just Run.