McGraw-Hill Publishers are scrambling to rewrite an embarrassing textbook entry that refers to African slaves as “workers.”
What’s worse is that this isn’t the first time McGraw-Hill has spread misinformation in their textbooks…
What’s the deal with “Canada?”
The Second City Toronto thought a good place to start would be to answer your burning questions about all things Canadian.
Great first question! To find us, just drive North until a man with a gun stops you. Or, if you don’t choose to go through Detroit, drive North until you reach a politely-manned Canadian border patrol station.
Well, you technically phrased that as a question, so… Yes, you are right.
Yes. Yes, it is. It is a part of the North American continent. But is it a part of the United States? The answer to that is also yes. Technically we’re a different country, but we’re so dependent on the USA culturally and economically that we’re like your orphaned cousin Eddie who lives in the attic. Just because we have our own room doesn’t mean we have our own house.
No. Sarah Palin borrowed it once, and now she’s constantly slagging it.
I know, right? There’s like gravy everywhere! It’s on Poutine (french fries, cheese curds, gravy), Yorkshire pudding (bready thing with gravy that’s not pudding) and our fast food chicken (entirely made of gravy). There’s even a gravy train, so we’ve heard, but nobody seems to be able to find it.
That’s a dumb question. And fuck you.
We might, but we don’t think so. We know we have a Prime Minister named Stephen Harper who likes cats and plays the piano. He’s also a neo-conservative intellectual from Alberta oil country. In other words, he’s a smarter version of George W. Bush. In other words he’s Jeb Bush.
Our major exports are:
So far, the United States only buys the oil.
Please stop calling them Canadian. They’re your problem now.
Klaus Schuller is the producer of The Second City Toronto and a recent applicant for Canadian Citizenship.